My mind just played the Joker card.

My mind is racing
It will not stop
Darkness swirls
Amidst the plot
Lonely, scared and insecure
Drugs call my name
It’s me, they lure
They wrap me in
Their warm embrace
My lover has a scary face
Powder, pills, or smoking weed,
I pick up once, where will it lead?
Institutions, jails, or DEAD.
I could go to a meeting instead.
The choice seems clear,
Yet I live in fear
Will I do the right thing?
What would I bring?
I could sit in a chair
With a vacant stare
And nothing to share
But would I dare?
My life hangs – on the line
Truth is, I’m not fine.
I could pick up the phone
But I’d rather be alone
It’s my comfort zone
I know what you’ll say
Can’t stay sober that way
I guess I could pray
Make it all go away
The choice shouldn’t be this hard
My mind just played the joker card.