17 years ago I couldn’t imagine life without A and D. Today I can’t imagine life with it. Back then if I’d been asked, I would have told you getting clean was the hardest thing I would ever do. But today looking back, I realize that’s not true. The hardest thing I ever do in my recovery, is to be REAL. It’s not easy to be real, it means you feel EVERYTHING – without a numbing crutch. It also means you’re responsible for your behaviours, reactions and attitudes. In other words, you grow up. (Let’s face it, all grown ups are not grown up!)
When sober, life still happens and for many of us we struggle in relationship to the people we love most. Communication is difficult. Hurt is real and raw. Repairing the damage of your actions can take a lifetime. You may find your relationship with family and friends to be a trigger. It’s hard to refrain from telling your loved ones to work on their shit, when you’re working so hard on yours! The truth is, just because you get sober, doesn’t mean you’re going to have a fairy tale ending. But you do have tools and when you use them, you’ll find peace of mind and gratitude. There isn’t a day clean, no matter how badly I hurt, that I would trade to go back and live wasted.
HOPE.
Hold On Pain Ends.
Death however, is final.